This week we have a bonus in the crypt as we take a look at some of our favorite holiday horror flicks for the winter season.
by Adam Holtzapfel
Contrary to what most believe, horror is not just for October and this list of Yuletide slayers is sure to please anyone.
The first movie on my list is Adam Green’s Frozen. While not a Christmas film it does take place in the dead of winter and is worth a watch for that reason. Starring Shawn Ashmore, Emma Bell, and Kevin Zegers as the main cast, this film weaves a tale of what would you do to survive as the three get stranded on a chairlift.
Coming out in 2010 this 93 minute film builds tension as it inches along.
Next on our list is 1990’s Misery. Directed by Rob Reiner based on Stephen King’s novel James Caan and Kathy Bates deliver performances that will jar the viewer. Again not a holiday movie, but a good watch on those “snow days” from work. We’ve all seen this film, so we’re familiar with the snowy landscape that leads to the events about to happen.
There’s some scenes that are sure to make first time viewers cringe, the pacing also just builds dread until the final act.
Now that we’ve covered a couple of pre holiday winter weather films, let’s dive into the heart of the season.
Gather the family around and toss another log on the fire as we queue up Mike Lombardo’s “I’m Dreaming Of A White Doomsday”.
This 2017 film is a post apocalyptic tale that shows a family played by Hope Bikle, Damian Maffei, and Reeve Blazi trying to navigate the wasteland and find some sense of normalcy. For me this flick is a punch in the gut that lasts 71 minutes, but feels neverending.
We follow the bleakness of White Doomsday with the often forgotten Rare Exports.
We all have that film we love that our spouse or significant other loathes. This is mine.
Rare Exports takes place in Finland as a couple of children think a secret mine drilling has found the tomb of Santa. What they uncover is something much more sinister and uncanny.
Clocking in at just a little over an hour and twenty minutes, this is mostly build up to a small payoff.
It’s well acted and pairs well with the shorts Rare Exports Inc and The Offical Rare Exports Inc Safety Instructions. While the shorts came out first, I recommend watching the film prior to them as not to ruin any twists.
What’s next you ask? Bill Goldberg at his finest, playing a deranged Santa in Santa’s Slay.
This time Goldberg isn’t spearing people or asking Who’s Next?, he’s spreading fear as a demonic Saint Nick. Filled with some fun kills (tree star used as a ninja star) this is a must to make the season one to remember. Spending centuries handing out cheer is sure to take it’s toll on anyone and this shows what happens when it does.
To round out the list are some older and modern classics that need no introduction or summary. They are Silent Night Deadly Night, Silent Night Deadly Night 2, Gremlins, Inside, Don’t Open Till Christmas, Christmas Evil, Black Christmas (1974 & 2006), Better Watch Out, and Krampus.
If you want to add some extra fun there’s the Tales From The Crypt (film and TV show) segment And All Through The House. There’s also the Christmas anthology. A Christmas Horror Story. For comic book fans you need to look no further than Batman Returns. And for a different take on picking the right tree, there’s the short Treevenge.
If you want your family to hate you there’s also the Star Wars Holiday Special. The only horror is that this exists.
Currently streaming on Shudder – Rare Exports, Better Watch Out, Silent Night, Deadly Night 2, Black Christmas (1974), A Christmas Horror Story. You can find a full list of Shudder holiday offerings here.
Currently streaming on Tubi – Santa’s Slay, Better Watch Out, Silent Night Deadly Night 2, Rare Exports, Frozen, Black Christmas (1974)
Currently streaming on Prime – Santa’s Slay, A Christmas Horror Story, I’m Dreaming Of A White Doomsday
Currently streaming on Hulu – Krampus
And remember kids, if you feel a chill…that’s not the cold. You’re in the crypt!
